Yet again Eurovision has thrown up it’s usual cauldron of controversy. Political voting seemed to be a very unfashionable thing this year and many countries appeared to vote a bit more fairly. With the dawn of Pop Idol ,X-factor and all that crap it seems we vote with our eyes almost more than with our ears.
Now Maltese singer, Chiara bless her has an amazing voice but she isn’t blessed with the most stunning of looks and there is a few pounds to be shed. (she has lost some already ). But she can sing. Now lets look at the winner some geezer from Norway. Puppy eyes cute little smile .....a fiddle (which he played well) trendy hair with the sticky up bits .......with the majority of Eurovisioners being female they found the right recipe.......I mean it’s not very macho is is?.......
”Alright Bert coming down the boozer tonight?”
“Nah mate it’s Eurovision ain’t it”............................don’t think so
I couldn’t possibly condone the comments made about Chiara eating all the pies I heard this week and a friend said to me that no wonder I came to England and married an English girl if Maltese girls look like that. Beauty my dear friends is not skin deep and Chiara is a very talented singer..........the fact she keeps pie shops in business and there is a rumour that Moscow has run out of pies is irrelevant ....I am no advert for Slimcea myself so these comments disgust me................................how very dare they
But there is hope for the UK next year in the wake of a fiddler winning in Moscow. Our very own Incredible Gurning Gizmo geezer and Violinist extraordinaire in response to an email I sent him this week where I had passed judgement on one of his compositions called Annalise(I mean who am I to judge....but hey)
And I quote.......
“Then I shall reserve Annalise for my Eurovision Song Contest entry next year performed with 2 violins, a cello - all girls of course, and some double-jointed contortionist dancers.”
Andrew Lloyd Webber..........who are you?
Sunday, 17 May 2009
Sunday, 10 May 2009
Match of the Day
Match report by the Incredible Gurning Gizmo Geezer.
It was Spriggan United's first match...
The team had been assembled over a short space of time, but had worked hard in their training sessions: this was their first friendly. There were teething problems with their kit, some of the shirts were a bit baggy, but they all managed to get to the stadium on time. But it was not the covered stadium they had expected, they were a bit worried if it rained, as their new kit wasn't waterproof and the colours might run. There was a match already playing, and it was a good standard, but the crowd didn't seem that interested - they were probably waiting for the main event.
The team started doing their warm-up, when the FA fixture-secretary came over and asked what the hell they were doing? It turned out that there had been a fixture mix-up, and the pitch was double-booked. As the team sighed with disappointment (ok, As the team raged in anger..), a compromise was hashed out where the match could be played immediately after the previous one, but they would need to complete their warm-up quickly. As they rushed to get ready, the captain seemed to have picked up an injury, but he recovered, so they were ready to start playing.
The first few minutes were a bit tentative, as might be expected. There were a few mistakes, and the team didn't seem to be enjoying themselves too much. The coach, who was also new to the job, done his best to keep them going. The crowd still seemed ambivalent to the whole affair,no cheering or booing - it turned out they were all listening on the radio to Blackburn beating Portsmouth 2-0 (seems they were all Portsmouth fans). Anyway, Spriggan's match finished, and the team felt disappointed with their performance and the resulting 0-0 draw.
Later, they sat together watching 'Match Of The Day', expecting a depressing experience. But they were surprised that they did better than they thought at the time, and a few sick parrots were cured. Alan Hansen said that it was "a good defensive performance - the team and coach show promise if they keep working".
It was Spriggan United's first match...
The team had been assembled over a short space of time, but had worked hard in their training sessions: this was their first friendly. There were teething problems with their kit, some of the shirts were a bit baggy, but they all managed to get to the stadium on time. But it was not the covered stadium they had expected, they were a bit worried if it rained, as their new kit wasn't waterproof and the colours might run. There was a match already playing, and it was a good standard, but the crowd didn't seem that interested - they were probably waiting for the main event.
The team started doing their warm-up, when the FA fixture-secretary came over and asked what the hell they were doing? It turned out that there had been a fixture mix-up, and the pitch was double-booked. As the team sighed with disappointment (ok, As the team raged in anger..), a compromise was hashed out where the match could be played immediately after the previous one, but they would need to complete their warm-up quickly. As they rushed to get ready, the captain seemed to have picked up an injury, but he recovered, so they were ready to start playing.
The first few minutes were a bit tentative, as might be expected. There were a few mistakes, and the team didn't seem to be enjoying themselves too much. The coach, who was also new to the job, done his best to keep them going. The crowd still seemed ambivalent to the whole affair,no cheering or booing - it turned out they were all listening on the radio to Blackburn beating Portsmouth 2-0 (seems they were all Portsmouth fans). Anyway, Spriggan's match finished, and the team felt disappointed with their performance and the resulting 0-0 draw.
Later, they sat together watching 'Match Of The Day', expecting a depressing experience. But they were surprised that they did better than they thought at the time, and a few sick parrots were cured. Alan Hansen said that it was "a good defensive performance - the team and coach show promise if they keep working".
Saturday, 9 May 2009
Does My Bum Look Big In This?
It was a sunny Friday afternoon....(bit like a peter and Jane story isn't it?....wonder what happened to them?.....probably drawing pensions now..)
Anyway I was driving home so I decided to give The Incredible Gurning Gizmo kid a bell to see what time e was coming round to do the last minute labelling so the sound desk would be at least idiot proof if not Dark Marge proof.....
I was met with a muffled "wait a minute ...just taking my guitar off" I waited as I heard the receiver get put down and picked up again ."Been practicing ? good lad " I said in admiration for our fiddling guitarist's dedication......"ahh well no actually I was just trying on the pirate shirt" I swerved the car as I realised Gurning boy was indeed posing in front of the mirror in stage kit....with his guitar....."You wearing trousers? " I asked "or just the codpiece" a nervous chuckle was received down the line and I had further visions of Gizmo standing there with just a pirate shirt and codpiece posing with his semi ......acoustic....and then having a good fiddle with the screaming banana..........(his yellow electro violin that is) I can just imagine him calling the Phantom Pinger into the front room..."does my bum look big in this?" just as I was erasing this disturbing vision from my head this evening the pair of them were talking about looking for a screw in a box full of wires......very highly irregular I'm sure.
Well here we are ....all the wires labelled...Gurno and pinger did a great job tonight in all seriousness and apart from there musical talent I welcome their organisational and technical skills.As the Manic street preachers clang their leccy guitars on Later with Jools Holland (and Paolo Nutini challenges are very own gurning champ to a gurn down as he puts on that stupid voice which sounds like a badly tuned radio station )it's time for me to turn in as it is now May the 9th and it is the day we open another chapter in the young history of Spriggan Mist....Whatever that carefully put together sound set up chucks out tomorrow it will be from the heart and our own work......which we are all very proud of.....I hope those that are there tomorrow like it too. If not ....no worries we'll be having a ball anyway
Anyway I was driving home so I decided to give The Incredible Gurning Gizmo kid a bell to see what time e was coming round to do the last minute labelling so the sound desk would be at least idiot proof if not Dark Marge proof.....
I was met with a muffled "wait a minute ...just taking my guitar off" I waited as I heard the receiver get put down and picked up again ."Been practicing ? good lad " I said in admiration for our fiddling guitarist's dedication......"ahh well no actually I was just trying on the pirate shirt" I swerved the car as I realised Gurning boy was indeed posing in front of the mirror in stage kit....with his guitar....."You wearing trousers? " I asked "or just the codpiece" a nervous chuckle was received down the line and I had further visions of Gizmo standing there with just a pirate shirt and codpiece posing with his semi ......acoustic....and then having a good fiddle with the screaming banana..........(his yellow electro violin that is) I can just imagine him calling the Phantom Pinger into the front room..."does my bum look big in this?" just as I was erasing this disturbing vision from my head this evening the pair of them were talking about looking for a screw in a box full of wires......very highly irregular I'm sure.
Well here we are ....all the wires labelled...Gurno and pinger did a great job tonight in all seriousness and apart from there musical talent I welcome their organisational and technical skills.As the Manic street preachers clang their leccy guitars on Later with Jools Holland (and Paolo Nutini challenges are very own gurning champ to a gurn down as he puts on that stupid voice which sounds like a badly tuned radio station )it's time for me to turn in as it is now May the 9th and it is the day we open another chapter in the young history of Spriggan Mist....Whatever that carefully put together sound set up chucks out tomorrow it will be from the heart and our own work......which we are all very proud of.....I hope those that are there tomorrow like it too. If not ....no worries we'll be having a ball anyway
Tuesday, 5 May 2009
Wish It Was a Stinker!
A terrible thing happened at rehearsals the other night……..No…. The Incredible Gurning man didn’t lose half his bow up his nose whilst vigorously fiddling his solo in Waiting for a Dewdrop to Fall nor did Wifey’s Sax start blowing bubbles ….something far worse …….we had a great rehearsal……we played the best yet…..and it was the last one before the first gig…….it should have been a stinker..!!!! our only saving grace is that we mucked up Lazy Stones.
So here we are the first gig upon us on Saturday . Come four o’clock at the Plough and Harrow in Warfield at their fundraising event we will be in full swing and Spriggan Mist’s music will be heard live properly for the first time.
The Dark Marge or Daft Wormwood as he calls himself these days will be in attendance ….he will be like Worzel Gummidge at gigs …apart from the smelly holey socks and the unkempt appearance ,he’ll have different heads for different tasks ….Roady, soundman ,official photographer/cameraman..not to mention security…….hey I kid you not….at work the other day I got smiled and winked at whilst standing outside a railway station …you just don’t know…! when in full swing I might get accosted on stage……(ok ok the winker was a bloke who was obviously very gay and camp with it …..but I might still need security…maybe even more so ) I have instructed the band that Dark Marge likes to be called Oy! And really likes a kick in the butt if he doesn’t respond quick enough…….
So with a week of work ahead of me I am indeed distracted by the gig …..and with a whole pile of work lined up for me I’m struggling to stay focussed… work is getting in the way !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So here we are the first gig upon us on Saturday . Come four o’clock at the Plough and Harrow in Warfield at their fundraising event we will be in full swing and Spriggan Mist’s music will be heard live properly for the first time.
The Dark Marge or Daft Wormwood as he calls himself these days will be in attendance ….he will be like Worzel Gummidge at gigs …apart from the smelly holey socks and the unkempt appearance ,he’ll have different heads for different tasks ….Roady, soundman ,official photographer/cameraman..not to mention security…….hey I kid you not….at work the other day I got smiled and winked at whilst standing outside a railway station …you just don’t know…! when in full swing I might get accosted on stage……(ok ok the winker was a bloke who was obviously very gay and camp with it …..but I might still need security…maybe even more so ) I have instructed the band that Dark Marge likes to be called Oy! And really likes a kick in the butt if he doesn’t respond quick enough…….
So with a week of work ahead of me I am indeed distracted by the gig …..and with a whole pile of work lined up for me I’m struggling to stay focussed… work is getting in the way !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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