An Arab Sheik dancing with two nuns ......Snow White handing out champers to Wonder Woman ,Batman and BatGirl.....Darth Vader sharing a cuddle with pink panther......hallucinations after eating some of Mother Dearest's weird mushrooms.......??????? ...No!!!!!! it was Jockanese K....MBE's New Years party! (incidentally Mother Dearest went sick for this party ....she blamed a dodgy prawn she eat ....I reckon it was the mushrooms me self)
......Anyway I dressed as a monk and had to endure the ...."what's wrong with you...? do you have a monk on ?" jokes all evening . Jockanese K .....MBE was dressed as a clown ....(no change there then?) Mrs Jockanese K (Snow White) with the help no doubt from her mum...(belly dancer) and sister Auntie Ria (Nun) put on a wonderful spread of food. I have some great footage of Wifey (who rather alarmingly made a fantastic nun) dancing to Jockanese K....MBE's MP3 collection......(not easy to say on the morning after the night before!!!!)
Now the Jockmeister is a wonderful man . (cue lone piper in background) fighting for Queen and country .....for good against evil... a pillar of society ..etc etc.......but bye heck is his music collection Shit!!!!!!!! There was Blue ,Mika ,S club and music of this ilk pumping away........in despair I went and spoke to the Sheik cunningly disguised as Auntie Ria's husband Chucky...who was still recovering from his wife lifting her habit to reveal black fishnets and backside inches from his fake beard!!!!!! We sat , slagging off Jocky K...MBE's music collection as Lavender by Marillion came on and I got up and started to move on to the dance floor dancing in a Magners induced dance as I got up......(rather Peter Kay stylie) only for it to be changed as I reached the middle of the room to some crap by some geezer by George Michael. So I took my Monk arse over to J and J (another couple) and commented on how good J the boy racer's costume was ...ingenious I told him coming as a deck chair!!!!! my comment was met with a stony......."I'm not in costume.....it's my shirt" but bless he had just had a stone chip his windscreen on his Audi on the way to the party
So at midnight poppers popped and Shampoo drunk and the rather bizarre sight of a Mexican kissing a Leprechaun and Wonder woman hugging an Arab, a Clown kissing Snow white ,a Monk kissing a Nun ....well you get my drift.
So to quote that great band Hot Machero .......words written by Boots
"All of those dear to us Happy New Year !!!!!!"
Dearest Monk, with the Monk on!!!
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry that my music collection caused your ears so much pain, however may i point out to all the Hotties out there, "Is it sad that i have the music, or sad that you actually knew all the names of said bands???" Anyway you got your request for the Kaiser Chiefs. All laughs aside, it was a pleasure to have you!!, and next time ill try an update my collection just for you.