Inherited madness

Determined not to wake up late this morning I woke up on the hour every hour I eventually beat the alarm clock......(not literally smacking it about!) I woke up five minutes before it was due to go off and dragged my body into the real world. My 5 year old mini rockstar was on fine form last night. Whilst trying to arrange delivery of wifey's new amp He dissappeared upstairs with his accomplace mini minx. Mini minx sensing that i knew they had been up to mischief coughed Rock star's henoius crime "he's stuffed a feather down the plug hole Daddy?" My immediate pesemistic reaction was "was there a bird attached to it at the time?" That kind of humour is lost on a two year old and i quickly made attempts to rescue said feather before we had a blockage but it had gone......Rockstar made himself scarce.
Mother dearest on hearing the story of the feather and the incident where our mini Rockstar had his sister by the ankles and decided that he would wheel barrow her up the stairs likened him to my brother the the unhinged one Dark Magi himself,. In his childhood (which i hasten to add is in it's 42nd year!!!) DM did all sorts of weird and wonderful things that modern science would not be able to fathom. One such incident was when as an early teen he decided that he would do a cremation ceremony of a plastic soldier. Ceremoniously wrapping him in tissue dousing him in white spirit attaching him to a piece of string setting him a light and throwing him out the window.!?!?!? Of course the string burned through, the soldier now a blazing inferno fell to the sloped conservatory roof and rolled down placing himself in the gutter which was plastic and starting to melt. The rest of the family were quite happy downstairs oblivious to the hapless teenager running through the house like John Cleese on speed and then hooking a great ball of fire out of a gutter. So it is no wonder that Rock star has a vein of eccentricity about him.
Whilst picking up Rockstar from School today Agent A the Parent/ Teachers Association’s secret weapon engaged me in conversation. I found out that D-day is 30th of June. That is when Hot Machero go public at the school fete. Agent A started to get excited about the band....“We can erect a stage in the middle of the field ....we can .....and........” I explained that we will drive Eddy onto the field in a nice corner pitch up the awning put the sides up chuck out the instruments amps etc etc and play a few tunes every so often.....I then made the mistake.........I threw away a comment as you would a cheap advert from your Sunday newspaper. I said jokingly.....”so if you have any requests?” Agent A went into overdrive...”I could put a newsletter round for requests and you could play them at the fete.....I know!......we could give them 5 songs and people can bid for which song they like and want you to play“
I started changing colour.
Nervously I asked ......”What songs do you have in ......a.....mind?” Agent A went into a rendition of Queen singing the line “and they call me Mr Fahrenheit ...and I’ll make a supersonic woman of you” My mind went to SJ. Imagining SJ strutting her stuff like Freddie Mercury. Before i could dismiss the idea she was off again......”How about I feel like dancin dancin” Agent A went into the most Camp dance ever....yes she wants us to do Scissor Sisters.......................NO! HOLD FIRE!!!!!!!! MAKE SAFE!!!!! This conversation was going rapidly downhill. I explained that the bidding thing was a little advanced for this year and unless I put a clamp on my lower regions I could not sound like the male voice in the Scissor Sisters.............I did manage to pacify her as I said we may sing Chelsea Dagger by the Fratellis. Made up by this, she disappeared with her PTA comrades leaving me in a slumped heap in the playground sweating like a goodun.

Oh by the way....listened to Radio 2 again today.....Justin Hawkins was on there though so cut me some slack !